If I told you that a simple piece of paper and a pencil could make your life less stressful would you believe me? It is TRUE! Just as clutter in our physical environment can drain our energy, mental clutter has the same effect. My life is full of lists. When I fail to make lists I can tell a difference in my productivity and focus. I want to share with you why and how I make lists.
1. Lists help get all that mental clutter outside of myself so that I can focus on what needs to happen and how I am going to make it happen. The simple act of writing down all that is swirling in my brain and looking at it makes me feel in charge. It allows me to see what needs to happen. Sometimes, I can see that X needs to happen before I can do Y, so that means X gets priority treatment. Sometimes, I see the best way that errands need to be run so that I am not backtracking, saving me time and gas. Sometimes, I realize that there is a task that can wait until another day. It really doesn't seem as pressing now that I've dumped it from my brain onto the paper. Sometimes, I realize that I can delegate the task and not even do it myself. That's ALWAYS nice!
2. Lists help me be intentional with my time. When I am intentional with my time my productivity soars. I feel a sense of accomplishment when I check things off my list. As I wrote in my last post, this feeling of accomplishment leads to a feeling of fulfilment. When I am not intentional with my time I am easily distracted by any number of things. I find I am less easily distracted if I have a mission to accomplish.
3. I have many lists in my home for different purposes. The lists are in a location where I can see them, add to them and check them off. I have a running grocery list so I can immediately write down an item I need when I think of it. I have a menu list, usually for two weeks at a time. This helps me know what I need to purchase at the store as well as know how I need to prepare for our evening meal. For more info on meal planning see my post "Mamma's Mealtime Mania." I have a list of projects I want to get accomplished around the house such as cleaning out the kitchen cabinets or painting a closet. Each night I make a list of things that need to happen the next day such as errands, vacuuming, and preparing for a Sunday School lesson. This list might also include one of those projects from the previous list like painting a closet. I don't usually include things that I do everyday such as making the beds or emptying the dishwasher. But it could. If making a big list of EVERYTHING you need to do makes you feel good then do it! By the way, I have been known to do something that was not on the list and then add it to the list after I accomplished it just so I can mark it off the list. I know, it may be a little OCD, but whatever. It works for me!
4. If I had to choose the most important list it would be the daily list I make each night for the next day. How we spend our time each day culminates into how we spend our lives. Making the list at night is important because it gives you a head start on your day. It's already mapped out. If you are the type of person who likes to jump out of bed and get going you can immediately get busy. If you are the type who is still a little foggy in the morning and needs a while to totally wake up you don't have to try to think that early in the morning.
5. I don't let my lists stress me out. My lists help decrease my stress because they tell me what needs to happen next. If I feel that something on my list is causing me stress I try breaking it down into smaller parts. For example, if I write "clean the house" on the list that's too big and too vague. I can change that to "dust the downstairs, vacuum and clean the bathroom." Do you see how breaking the task down into smaller chunks makes the tasks more concrete? This allows me to wrap my brain around what exactly needs to happen.
6. I am not a slave to my lists. Although I use them as a guide, there are times when snuggling with my boys, spending time with my husband, spending some time alone with God or talking with a neighbor is far more pressing than anything on my list. When everything on my list doesn't get accomplished it simply goes on the next day's list. And sometimes things even get thrown off the list because my attitude or perspective has changed on that particular item.
If you are not already a list maker I challenge you to become one. See how it can lighten your mental clutter, increase your productivity and help you feel less stressed. See how the power of the list will increase your focus and allow you to make intentional decisions about how you spend your time.
Monday, January 21, 2013
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Feeling Fulfilled
Within the last month I have spoken with two moms who were contemplating making the switch from working outside the home to becoming stay-at-home moms. Both expressed concerns over feeling bored, isolated, unscheduled, and worried about the temptation to stay in their jammies all day. For the last five years I have been staying at home with my twins. I do have a small business, but it does not take much time each week. I can honestly tell you that in the last five years I have NEVER felt bored! In my opinion, boredom is a state of mind. You have the power to change that. There have been days when I have felt unmotivated or just down right worn out. But those two feelings are very different from being in a state of boredom. In fact, most days I wish I had more hours in the day because there is so much I want to do!
I have heard some stay-at-home moms say they don't feel fulfilled. I can honestly say that I feel fulfilled. In fact, I was recently asked to return to work in the profession that I worked in before the boys were born. It was tempting, but when it came down to it, the main reason I would have returned was for money, not fulfillment. I decided that I would rather have a little more time at home with my boys than money. I can always earn it later. I can't get the time back.
I want to address the importance of having a plan for the day. When you say the words schedule or routine some people automatically cringe. They associate those words with BOR-ING. However, as I've said before in earlier posts, a schedule actually allows you to think less and be more productive. I am not here to tell you what your schedule should look like. Although you may have certain commitments like getting older children to school on time, you are in control of the majority of your day. Take charge of those hours!
Here's the key to having a schedule: flexibility. Life happens and sometimes things just don't go as planned. It's ok. When this happens know that when you wake up the next day you have the opportunity to try it again. I am not talking about scheduling every minute of your day. Ugh! That is just setting yourself up for feeling frustrated. Having a reasonable idea about what needs to happen each day is key to feeling like you have accomplished something which leads to a feeling of fulfilment.
Let me share with you what our typical schedule is during the week so you can see an example. Monday, Wednesday, & Friday: 7:30 get up, brush teeth, get dressed, eat. Out the door by 8:40 to Preschool at the Y. While the boys are in school I am either exercising, running errands, or working on a project at home. 11:30 pick the boys up from school. Eat lunch with Dad at home. We typically have 1:00 to 5:00 open to play with friends, work on a science project, bake cookies, watch a movie, or go somewhere like the library, park or pool. Anything can happen within those 4 hours. On Tuesdays my mom usually has the boys so I am able to get projects done, shop by myself or or just have a break. Thursday is kind of a free day for us. It's the only day we don't have to get up and go somewhere. We are taking advantage of it because we won't have that when it's time for Kindergarten in August. On these days sometimes we DO stay in our jammies all day. It's ok! Because we aren't doing it every day it's a treat, not the habit of a slacker.
I find that making lists helps me tremendously. I am preparing an entire post dedicated to this subject, but until then, trust me, make lists! Make them each night for the next day. You will feel prepared for the day when you get up. Keep running lists of things you need to do. At all times I have a list of projects I want to complete, such as cleaning out my closet, a list of things that need to happen each day like making a cake to take to church for a funeral dinner, and a grocery list so I can add items to it when I run out of them. Keep the lists in a place that is accessible so you can view them and add to them, and of course cross things off them.
Caring for your children and your family is the most important job you will ever do. Work at it like you would work for an employer. You would not show up to a board meeting at your office unprepared. Take the steps to prepare for your role. Suit up, show up, give it your best and find fulfilment!
I have heard some stay-at-home moms say they don't feel fulfilled. I can honestly say that I feel fulfilled. In fact, I was recently asked to return to work in the profession that I worked in before the boys were born. It was tempting, but when it came down to it, the main reason I would have returned was for money, not fulfillment. I decided that I would rather have a little more time at home with my boys than money. I can always earn it later. I can't get the time back.
I want to address the importance of having a plan for the day. When you say the words schedule or routine some people automatically cringe. They associate those words with BOR-ING. However, as I've said before in earlier posts, a schedule actually allows you to think less and be more productive. I am not here to tell you what your schedule should look like. Although you may have certain commitments like getting older children to school on time, you are in control of the majority of your day. Take charge of those hours!
Here's the key to having a schedule: flexibility. Life happens and sometimes things just don't go as planned. It's ok. When this happens know that when you wake up the next day you have the opportunity to try it again. I am not talking about scheduling every minute of your day. Ugh! That is just setting yourself up for feeling frustrated. Having a reasonable idea about what needs to happen each day is key to feeling like you have accomplished something which leads to a feeling of fulfilment.
Let me share with you what our typical schedule is during the week so you can see an example. Monday, Wednesday, & Friday: 7:30 get up, brush teeth, get dressed, eat. Out the door by 8:40 to Preschool at the Y. While the boys are in school I am either exercising, running errands, or working on a project at home. 11:30 pick the boys up from school. Eat lunch with Dad at home. We typically have 1:00 to 5:00 open to play with friends, work on a science project, bake cookies, watch a movie, or go somewhere like the library, park or pool. Anything can happen within those 4 hours. On Tuesdays my mom usually has the boys so I am able to get projects done, shop by myself or or just have a break. Thursday is kind of a free day for us. It's the only day we don't have to get up and go somewhere. We are taking advantage of it because we won't have that when it's time for Kindergarten in August. On these days sometimes we DO stay in our jammies all day. It's ok! Because we aren't doing it every day it's a treat, not the habit of a slacker.
I find that making lists helps me tremendously. I am preparing an entire post dedicated to this subject, but until then, trust me, make lists! Make them each night for the next day. You will feel prepared for the day when you get up. Keep running lists of things you need to do. At all times I have a list of projects I want to complete, such as cleaning out my closet, a list of things that need to happen each day like making a cake to take to church for a funeral dinner, and a grocery list so I can add items to it when I run out of them. Keep the lists in a place that is accessible so you can view them and add to them, and of course cross things off them.
Caring for your children and your family is the most important job you will ever do. Work at it like you would work for an employer. You would not show up to a board meeting at your office unprepared. Take the steps to prepare for your role. Suit up, show up, give it your best and find fulfilment!
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Ditching Scrapbook Guilt
Today is the first day of the new year. We literally turn the page on the previous year to see a blank slate of opportunities held within the coming year. Many people evaluate their lives at this point each year. I enjoy dreaming, planning and mapping out what I hope for in the new year. I enjoy thinking about what's to come in the next 12 months. What will this year hold for our family? Where will we be at this time next year? What do I want to accomplish? What do I want to let go of?
Today I write about letting go of something I've held onto for the last five years that I no longer can grasp: scrapbooking my children's lives. I began with the best intentions. I got together with a few girlfriends and we would scrap and chat. These were fun and productive evenings, but as with many things, life got in the way and we stopped meeting for this purpose. My twins were 5 years old in October. Guess how far along I am in their scrapbooks? I have their 6 month pages finished. Hey, if I didn't have to do two I would have had a whole year done, right?
I kept telling myself that I would get caught up. First, I thought when I moved into a home that allowed me ample space to spread out and create that I would be a scrapping queen. Wrong. But I do have it organized in a lovely way so that I can easily get to it. That counts for something, right? Then I told myself when they started preschool that I would have more time to tackle such endeavors. It doesn't happen now either. I see a pattern. I am interested in working on it but not committed enough to make it happen. This is truly a lesson that can be applied to many areas of life.
So, what shall I do? I will finish documenting the second 6 months of my sons' lives and then I will sell my equipment, embellishments, gadgets, and gizmos at my annual garage sale. I will make online albums that take a fraction of the time and quite honestly may hold up better over time than my handmade ones. I will ditch the guilt that lurks in the back of my mind. I will enjoy making new memories instead of obsessing about how to find time to preserve the old ones.
Today I write about letting go of something I've held onto for the last five years that I no longer can grasp: scrapbooking my children's lives. I began with the best intentions. I got together with a few girlfriends and we would scrap and chat. These were fun and productive evenings, but as with many things, life got in the way and we stopped meeting for this purpose. My twins were 5 years old in October. Guess how far along I am in their scrapbooks? I have their 6 month pages finished. Hey, if I didn't have to do two I would have had a whole year done, right?
I kept telling myself that I would get caught up. First, I thought when I moved into a home that allowed me ample space to spread out and create that I would be a scrapping queen. Wrong. But I do have it organized in a lovely way so that I can easily get to it. That counts for something, right? Then I told myself when they started preschool that I would have more time to tackle such endeavors. It doesn't happen now either. I see a pattern. I am interested in working on it but not committed enough to make it happen. This is truly a lesson that can be applied to many areas of life.
So, what shall I do? I will finish documenting the second 6 months of my sons' lives and then I will sell my equipment, embellishments, gadgets, and gizmos at my annual garage sale. I will make online albums that take a fraction of the time and quite honestly may hold up better over time than my handmade ones. I will ditch the guilt that lurks in the back of my mind. I will enjoy making new memories instead of obsessing about how to find time to preserve the old ones.
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